Tuesday, February 03, 2009

Trying to be less angry

Okay, trying to be more positive today. I didn’t lose a ton of weight this week, I definitely did not exercise like I should’ve. I had this awful soup yesterday, which did not fill me up at all, so I kept eating things to try to make up for it, and then for some reason by the end of the day, I had a headache that was so intense I honestly wondered if I was having a stroke. It was only on one side of my head, and so, so intense. My husband massaged my shoulders and neck and BOY there was a spot there that is so sore. And still is. I think we need to invest in a massager thingy that you put in your chair. Because I cannot take it.

So, I take my first spinning class today. I really fight my social anxieties to take these classes. I was concerned about whether I should wear my cycling shoes and shorts, even though I’m so out of shape. I finally decided “F it, this is my journey, and if it makes me feel better to wear the bike shorts and my clipless shoes, then I’m going to do it!”. I know it won’t be easy, but I don’t want easy. I want to get healthy. I want to take S out in the Burley this spring. I want to get back on my Homegrown and ride a trail with M. I want to feel good, no matter where I live. I want to enjoy riding, not dread every hill climb. And I know that I can do it. I KNOW I CAN!

I keep picturing myself doing these things, and it works as great motivation. Whether I hate my job or not, I need to do myself a favor and use the tools around me to my greatest benefit. I will not let my anger/frustration sabotage this effort.

So, weight: 162.0, 6.8 lbs lost.

I bought a size 12 in jeans this weekend. From a 14. It rocks. The other ones I could actually pull off without unbuttoning them. From losing 7 pounds? Working out definitely makes a difference.

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