V Day 2009

Valentine’s Day. We have a funny relationship, me and Valentine’s Day. When I was younger, in High School, it was about everyone knowing that I got flowers (once in four years), or trying to hide the fact that I didn’t. Even after I was married (but still 18!), I spent the entire day trying to tell myself not to expect flowers, that it was okay. And then, the flowers would arrive, and I would be so pleased. But if they didn’t get there until later, I was downright pouting by the time they got there.

And then, somewhere, something happened. I was genuinely happy for those that got something, but I really didn’t care so much if I got something or not.

You see, I met my husband when I was 17 and he was 20. We had that passionate, “blinded by love”, rollercoaster, oh my god I’m gonna die because we argued, oh my god I’m so happy because we made up kind of relationship. I think you have to be young to have that sort of marriage, because as you get older, you don’t have the stamina! As we grew and mellowed, got stronger, became more able to stand on our own two feet instead on leaning so hard on each other, we got stronger. Our relationship got stronger. We became stable. I like stable. I LOVE stable.

We know each other well enough to get on each other’s nerves almost to that point. But we know enough to stop before we get there. We also know that we love each other in a stronger, deeper way than we could have ever imagined back when we were married 19 years ago. So, if I get flowers, great, but I genuinely don’t care so much. I know he loves me. I feel loved on a daily basis.

It feels great not to care. And coincidentally, I did get some beautiful tulips. And a great card that plays Superfreak!

I love you, you big Palooka. Happy Valentine’s Day.